If at first I don't succeed I will just try, try and try again until I do!
If there is anything I have learnt from the all the events of the recent past, it is that our perception of things is not always as they seem. And most of all, every individual has a unique cognizance of themselves and the environment around them. Life is tough and only gets tougher as you live longer; I guess that is the epiphany we gain as we grow up into adults. It is quite a struggle to come to terms with reality because we are naturally incapable of complete objectivity as human beings. But I believe that the more maturity and experience we gain, the more objective we become. Perhaps not perfectly so, but more so than without going through the exploits that shape us, our thinking, our decisions and our actions. We are what we know, where we have been and what we have done. Even our expectations, dreams and desires are shaped by our backgrounds; education, family and culture. Anomalies are to be expected but they are the exceptions to the rule, not the norm. Therefore it would not likely come as a shock to most people when fate brings due rewards to the deserving and appropriate consequences to those that warrant them. I have been greatly transformed by my many whirlwind adventures and my presently "reduced" circumstances so I no longer take certain things for granted. In fact I no longer take anything for granted. I am hungry for spectacular success because I am in a competition; not with other people but with my own self to satisfy my own grandiose desires.
I always claim to be such a narcissist, but perhaps I am not so self-centered after all. Truth be told there are people far more self-centered than me, to the point that even a narcissist like myself would acquiesce and feel chastened. I also feel I am a genius with an infallible memory but I keep forgetting things I shouldn't. And there are loads of far more intelligent people than I can ever be. As wealthy and accomplished a family as I am fortunate to be a member of, there many more that are wealthier and more accomplished. As handsome as I feel I am there are scores of much better looking men than me. As proud as I can be, I am the picture of humility in comparison to others. As majestic as my dreams are, there are those whose imaginations are truly awe-inspiring. I delve into science fiction novels and realize they put things in perspective; considering the myriad of galaxies filled with stars and their orbiting satellites, even Terra (Earth) in all its blue complexity is utterly insignificant, a speck of dust in the coldness of an boiling universe. So in measuring one's self worth, it is perhaps best to put things in the right perspective.
The prudent thing to do as a mature adult then is to simply understand oneself, and make use of available resources, both innate and acquired to reach personal goals - as they say use what you have to get what you want. However to become truly and consistently happy is not necessarily to be content with what you have but rather to be content with who you are. It is a fallacy to believe that having material possessions provide happiness, they only provide comfort. Undoubtedly comfort constitutes a part of happiness, but more so than that true happiness consists of being reconciled with yourself - accepting yourself for who you are and not who others desire for you to be. Too many times I find that most people (myself included) are caught in the trap of doing things to please others; family, friends, co-workers etc. Gradually I am learning to avoid this predicament and concentrating more on discovering just who I am and what makes me truly happy - and then pursuing those things with all the single-minded passion I can muster. If at first I don't succeed I will just try, try and try again until I do. Perhaps it is this determination to be true to myself and my desires as much as possible that makes me such an enigmatic and fascinating character; well at least to those that find me interesting :)
I always claim to be such a narcissist, but perhaps I am not so self-centered after all. Truth be told there are people far more self-centered than me, to the point that even a narcissist like myself would acquiesce and feel chastened. I also feel I am a genius with an infallible memory but I keep forgetting things I shouldn't. And there are loads of far more intelligent people than I can ever be. As wealthy and accomplished a family as I am fortunate to be a member of, there many more that are wealthier and more accomplished. As handsome as I feel I am there are scores of much better looking men than me. As proud as I can be, I am the picture of humility in comparison to others. As majestic as my dreams are, there are those whose imaginations are truly awe-inspiring. I delve into science fiction novels and realize they put things in perspective; considering the myriad of galaxies filled with stars and their orbiting satellites, even Terra (Earth) in all its blue complexity is utterly insignificant, a speck of dust in the coldness of an boiling universe. So in measuring one's self worth, it is perhaps best to put things in the right perspective.
The prudent thing to do as a mature adult then is to simply understand oneself, and make use of available resources, both innate and acquired to reach personal goals - as they say use what you have to get what you want. However to become truly and consistently happy is not necessarily to be content with what you have but rather to be content with who you are. It is a fallacy to believe that having material possessions provide happiness, they only provide comfort. Undoubtedly comfort constitutes a part of happiness, but more so than that true happiness consists of being reconciled with yourself - accepting yourself for who you are and not who others desire for you to be. Too many times I find that most people (myself included) are caught in the trap of doing things to please others; family, friends, co-workers etc. Gradually I am learning to avoid this predicament and concentrating more on discovering just who I am and what makes me truly happy - and then pursuing those things with all the single-minded passion I can muster. If at first I don't succeed I will just try, try and try again until I do. Perhaps it is this determination to be true to myself and my desires as much as possible that makes me such an enigmatic and fascinating character; well at least to those that find me interesting :)
Perhaps,
But then again,
Perhaps not!
Cheers and have a wonderful week!
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